Burning Touch

Let's make love;
touch me all over
let your hands roam free
kiss me in the places that take my breath from me
allow me to please you
let my mouth go to work
arousing all your needs
urging them on until it almost hurts
lets abandon our clothes
feel my skin on your skin
our bodies intertwined
loosing where end or begin
touching & tasting
the places our clothes conceal
pushing & pulling
finding places that seem unreal
where a lovers kiss can burn hot
with a passion that stings with its needs
where a man digs deep
looking for a place to plant his seed
with a passion unheard of
lets make love all night
until the sun rises & outshines our candle light

Empty Tears

I dissected the hollow eyes
the empty tears you cried,
verbally apologizing, mentally strategizing
plotting your next course of action,
your arms seemingly ached to hold me,
those empty tears put in place a distraction
your words carefully chosen, I'm trying to
find a way to put together this person
you left broken. You...you're clever
intuitively cunning, break her just a little moe
before she takes off running. Everytime you take
pieces away she's weakened, no longer
that strong, self assured, confident person you used to know, maybe, that person was too much to handle, so you had to find a way to
slowly dismantle. Every bit of her strength,
edurance and confidence, maybe you loved her
under false pretense, did it stroke your ego
to watch her fall? Did it fuel your desire
to watch her become less than who she used
to be? That person you destroyed was me
yet here I am vowing to find that
strength again, rebuilding the rubble
your destruction left behind and thank
you because what you've done helped
me see there's someone stronger inside of
me whose unwilling to bend or fold
who isn't buying empty dreams being sold
i can't take less than what I
deserve so I've become deaf to
meaningless words, I've grown numb
to those apologizes see, I love you, but
more than that..... I LOVE ME

All work, no Play

I try to make time for play, but when I do have time, I don't seem to have anyone to call. People have I guess, excluded me from their list of friends, due to the fact that, usually, most of the time, I'm working & can't do anything anyways. Uhhh, it sucks. I had the night off last night and couldn't even find anything to do. I am off tonight as well, and I am literally sitting in the house watching Bones, thinking about ceviche. Yesterday was Calvin & Melvins 32nd Birthday....I did get to see them tho, but not for long because my attention was distracted due to me drinking way to much, so not fun. Today is Roney's birthday, I wonder why I actually remember his birthday after the way our "relationship" ended. I don't even know if thats what you would call it, but regardless, we had something good, and being the confused or whatever male that he is, it abrubtly ended for no reason, which hurt and pissed me off. Why I care if he has a good birthday baffles me. I guess he isn't use to a true woman who actually cares about him & his happiness & whats on the inside, not just his outward appearance and whatnot. Ok enough. I think I'll post a few pictures? I love how when I write, my topics switch up so quick, why? because I can =)

So I ran away from my blog & everyone

I've been really busy working lately, between the drycleaners from 8am-2pm, picking my son up from school at 3pm and then working at the club from 6pm-230am...I am barely getting any sleep. At least my bills are paid, the ones I have. And even then, Im sooooo not budgeting right. I am saving. I plan on going to NY for my birthday, MY GOLDEN BIRTHDAY!!! I'll be 23 on October 23rd, yea yea yea =) I guess I will be there Oct. 22-28, wonder what the heck I'm going to do the whole time I'm there, I will def. run out of money by the weekend lol. I'm taking my camera this time, well I had it last time, but just didn't seem right to take pictures of Brooklyn and the Bronx. And when I was in the city, it was dark. I will be all over this time, most likely staying in Queens.

I just got back from F21 where I wish they didn't have stupid prices on such small things. But I did get some new leggings, a few white tees, and snappy belt, and a purdy necklace. I also got another pair of jeans and some pumps. I saw some heels I want from Bebe, but I want them in a different color other than black. I can't wait to go back to Bakers and see what I can buy =]

Ok, I'm currently reading like 3-4 books. I have my daily magazine readings, and I have been hooked the last year or so on reading Karla Deras blog, Karlascloset.com, I totally IDOLIZE her wardrobe, and who she presents herself to be. She is right on my list under Ashley Olsen. Beyonce is a good one. And there are a couple more that nobody has probably heard of.

And I think I'm going to go ahead & get my passport so when I'm ready to travel one day (in my dreams), Ill have that already lol.

Great Biography

I just finished reading a really great book that I got around Mother's Day called, The Color of Water, A Black Man's Tribute to His White Mother....

Brief Summary:

As a boy in Brooklyn's Red Hook projects, James McBride knew his mother was different. But when he asked about it, she'd simply say, "I'm light-skinned." Later he wondered if he was different, too, and asked his mother if he was black or white. "You're a human being," she snapped. "Educate yourself or you'll be a nobody!" And when James asked what color God was, she said, "God is the color of water"...As an adult , McBride finally persuaded his mother to tell her story -- the story of a rabbi's daughter, born in Poland and raised in the South, who fled to Harlem, married a black man, founded a Baptist church, and put tweleve children through college. The Color of Water is James McBride's tribute to his remarkable, eccentric, determined mother -- and an eloquent exploration of what family really means.

It was on the New York Times bestseller list. They said it best, complex & moving...suffused with issues of race, religion, and identity. Yet those issues, so much a part of their lives and stories, are not central. The triumph of the book -- and of their lives -- is that race and religion are transcended in these interwoven histories by family love, the sheer force of a mother's will and her unshakeable insistence that only two things really mattered: school and church...it is her voice -- unique, incisive, at once unsparing and ironic -- that is dominant in this paired history, and its richest contribution...The two stories, son's and mother's, beautifully juxtaposed, strike a graceful note at a time of racial polarization.

All 12 of her children went off to college to get degrees and almost all went on to further their education afterwards.


"In all thy ways acknowledge Him and He shall direct thy paths." Proverbs 3:6

My Neighbor Maria & Her Tarot Card Readings

Okay, so I have the most amazing neighbor named Maria. She is oh so talented in so many ways, she is in her early 40’s, recently seperated, and she has two kids. Her son is 15 and her daughter is 12 years old. Her daughter is my son’s best friend, they have decided that no matter what, they are always going to be friends, stuck to each other, no matter what; and you know what, I believe them. You should see the two of them together. Its hilarious. Tatiana is kinda bossy and loves to be the mother figure. Chris doesn’t take any non-sense tho. They do just about everything together but they do have there seperate lives, rarely lol. Maria is a professional personal trainer, that bartends and she reads tarot. I wasn’t so sure that tarot cards were actually real, but hey, to my surprise, so many things got hit right on the head. She is seriously amazing. I can’t wait to be read again, but I’m going to let some things fall into place first.

recipe for stuffed weekends

friday night i went on a dinner date, it went well, could have been more exciting, im really not very cool with this dating thing, i dont know how to describe it. Saturday night I worked for DeepSouth Entertainment at DownTown Live, Joan Jett was the featured artist and by the time she performed we had to stop admissions because we had reached capacity, that did not make ppl happy, AT ALL lol. I spent the rest of the evening trying to stop people from jumping the fence, and wishing despertly that i had inserts in my sneakers because my lower back was killing me. the night wasn’t over yet tho. my photographer/friend Greg escorted me over to Raleigh Times to finally get some food. They have out of this world guacamole/salsa, the chips add to the greatness. It was very loud tho. We then headed to DeepSouth for a drink or two and to listen to some more live music. Then it was crash time, my body couldn’t take anymore. I got up today and drove a hour to Pittsboro to meet with a great photographer Adam Sikora. He was a pleasure to speak with and I can’t wait to shoot with him, yah me. Im not relaxing before work tonight, and work tomorrow morning.

PS, someone stole my son’s bike, RIGHT OUT OF THE GARAGE!!!!!!